Friday, September 30, 2016

Have you ever had a day when you're so furious, so consumed with boiling rage and frustration that you look at your partner and think 'why do I even bother?' On some level, whether at the mild or not so mild end of the spectrum, we've all been there. Relationships and love are the hardest work of all and those who tell you that it should be effortless, clearly have never been in one.

There are moments when I wonder why I'm dedicating so much of my youth to being with just one person, but then he'll make me laugh so hard my ribs hurt and I'll forget all about it. As with everything else in life, it'll go through some bad times, so, for when you need a little help, here are 17 small things you can do to improve your relationship...

1. Spoon As Often As Possible

Spooning is said to be one of the best things in the world, mostly by me. It makes you feel comforted, safe and a lot of the time can lead to a little morning nookie. More spooning for everyone, I say.

2. Watch A Funny Film/Book Together In Bed

Close the curtains, turn off the lights and surround yourselves with blankets, all while watching the funniest film you can find. Not only will some time in the dark curled up together do you some good as a couple, laughing together is a great cure for anything.

3. Cook Together

And by cook, I don't mean dialing your usual takeaway. Get some ingredients together, clean your kitchen, throw on some music and cook something simple and tasty together. It'll give you some time to reconnect and eat something delicious too.

4. Wear An Outfit That You Know They Love

Of course, you should always wear what you want and if your partner tries to influence that, then tell them to take a hike. But every once in a blue moon, coming out dressed in that dress you know he can't take his eyes off or those pants she tells you your bum looks good in is simply a nice thing to do for your other half.

5. Schedule In Some Wild Sex

"Sex should be spontaneous and wild", I hear you say. Well, that's not always achievable, sadly. What with college work, part time jobs and friends, finding the time to squeeze in some sex sessions can prove difficult. By scheduling in some sex, you know exactly you're going to be getting some action, which is actually pretty sexy when you think about it...

6. Hold Hands More

Holding hands makes us feel wanted, loved and more together as a couple. Holding hands on a night out, in bed or even on the bus can help to alleviate any imminent tension and make you connect instantly once again.

7. Give Them A Back Rub When They're Stressed

Stress is a terrible thing and the last thing you need to be doing when your other half is stressed, is to anger them even further. Get them to lie down and massage away their stresses and tension.

8. Occasionally, Talk After Sex Instead Of Just Falling Asleep

Yes, we know that sometimes sex is such a strenuous workout that all you want to do afterwards is nap, but sometimes, after doing the most intimate thing you can with your other half, lying together and talking is a way to get even closer. Try it.

9. And Every Once In A While, Go Along With Their Rants

There are times when a person just needs a good rant. A chance to get it all out of their system, whether it's about their friends, a boss or some annoying idiot not pulling their weight in a group project. Instead of trying to fix the problem, just let them rant and occasionally agree with them. That's all you need to do.

10. Surprise Them On A Tuesday Afternoon

The most depressing time of the week (after Monday morning, of course) meaning this is the perfect time to surprise them with a little gesture. It could be something as small as buying them chocolate or sending them links to things you could both do together. Use your imagination.

11. Bring Them Coffee In Bed On A Saturday Morning

Because that makes you a great person and you'll never know when they could return the favor.

12. Text Them An 'I love you' Every Now And Then

Hearing it in person is important, yes, but there's nothing like checking the time on your phone and remembering that you're loved.

13. Plan A Weekend Of Nothingness With Them

It'll give you time to reboot, reconnect and have lots of sex, which are all necessary for a healthy and happy relationship. If you can do this somewhere different, even better.

14. Make A Pact To Use Your Phones Less Around One Another

Because it's not just really bad manners, it's also really bad for you as a couple. It can make you feel resented and ignored. Put the electronic devices away and just talk to one another.

15. Ask About Their Family And Friends From Time To Time

This shows that you care about not just them, but the people in their lives too. It shows selflessness and compassion. Plus, you know you love it when they ask you the same thing.

16. Come Up With A 'Save Me Now' Signal

To be used in situations where one of you is stuck talking to some bore at a party, awkward family moments or the times when you run into someone you don't like. A three blinks, one cough kind of thing should do the trick.



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